Constipation foods. Oh, sweet surgery delights, how we love thee!
Well, we do but our colons don’t so much. It’s hard to give up our sweets and starches, especially since one piece or one bite of the food is rarely enough to satisfy our craving.
Unfortunately, as I have experienced along with so many others, eating too much of these delicious yum yums leads to the painful arrival of the arch enemy of our intestines…constipation.
By the age of fifteen I saw more battles against constipation than most people do in a lifetime.
Therefore, you can take the advice of yours truly, since I stand as a living guinea pig of proof to this truth…the best way to beat constipation is to keep from getting it in the first place.
How do we do this? It all comes down to our basic nutrient sources: food and water.
First of all, above all else, water is our body’s best friend in getting rid of unwanted debris, all forms of debris including poop.
As a child, if I would have followed my mother’s loving direction, I would have drank my water and most likely avoided a whole lot of pain in the, er, um…colon.
However, I stubbornly disregarded this notion of drinking water as just too boring for me and paid the price for my freedom dearly.
With that being said, of the constipation foods to avoid, here is my own personal countdown of the top five foods and drink no no’s to avoid when in pursuit of sweet regularity.
Take a seat to avoid shock from the following information, for these are really delicious things.
Here we go:
I can just hear you on the other end of this article screaming in pain from this little piece of truth, but if you want to have those consistent bowel movements, try not to engorge the caffeine.
Caffeine comes in many different forms, like our familiar friend coffee, tea, coke, and…chocolate.
Yes, I said it, and I know your eyes are full of tears over that revelation. Do not fear, there’s a loophole if you can't give these things up completely without ceasing to exist.
It’s called moderation. Just eat or drink a little of these substances, and you, and your colon, will be just fine.
You and I both know what these foods look like: frozen dinners, potato chips, cereal and anything else that gets ground up, mixed and reformatted before you eat it.
Definitely watch these constipation foods and try to limit your consumption of them to a meal a day if you must.
Eating these foods at every meal will almost undoubtedly bring constipation knocking at your door.
Growing up, these were always my favorite. I could never get enough milk, ice cream, whip cream, butter and pudding. Oh so delicious, but oh such constipation foods.
Though dairy is the ultimate of comfort foods, you won’t be feeling the most comfortable on the porcelain throne the next day.
So find a better and kinder long term comfort buddy, and only take dairy for a ride occasionally.
(editor’s note: The reason dairy products constipate is because
in pasteurized dairy products the enzymes needed to digest the
proteins are dead. Pasteurization kills them all.
Any undigested food slows down transit
time in the colon, meaning constipation.
The only solution I know of is to drink a little unpasteurized
raw milk when you partake of dairy.
Isn't it just like mother nature to put in milk the enzymes needed to digest it, and just like us to kill those enzymes, then complain because dairy is a constipation food? :-)
Now this group has never been much of a sacrifice for me. However, I know for a lot of men out there this is the holy grail of food groups.
Sizzling steak and pork chops will get your saliva juices flowing like nothing else when that aroma hits the air. Just be mindful of portion size.
Red meat can take up to 70 hours to digest. Ouch!!! So chew well and think before getting up for that second and third hamburger.
Unless of course you want to experience the similar pain of delivering a baby the next couple of times you use the bathroom…it’s up to you.
If you went slightly light headed when you read my number one on my list of foods to avoid, you’re not alone.
Cake, cookies, candy, fudge, pies, pastries, peanut brittle…yes, these foods have an evil aftermath for our best friend, the colon.
Especially in the seasons of approaching holidays, these dreamy bad little sugary treats are typically the toughest to completely ignore.
If you can’t avoid these sweets, then drink drink drink that water…at least you won’t be dehydrated, adding to further constipation woes.
If you’re like me and live many times blissfully ignorant that these constipation foods affect the system in this manner, there’s still help.
A magnesium rich product known as Ionic Sea Minerals is the perfect companion for your colon to help it through tougher times.
The magnesium draws water into the colon and stool, keeping it soft, moist, and easier to expel.
Taking a little of this super liquid each day will assist in saving the day against the onset of constipation. Plus magnesium offers numerous other health benefits.
If you are already constipated and crying, not to worry.
Ionic Sea Minerals are easily mixed into many beverages. I find that juices work best for masking its bitter taste.
But taking it throughout the day by adding bit to whatever you are drinking throughout the day can actually improve your drink’s flavor.
The minerals are wonderfully portable for bowel emergencies on the go.
Also, not only will your colon be thrilled, your whole body will benefit from this stuff as it increases the power threshold of your immunity system to fight things off that are trying to beat up your body.
They are also an excellent electrolyte.
In closing, it’s easy to see the constipation foods to avoid. Now the choice: should I follow the guidelines?
I find that, even though I try to error on healthy eating more so than unhealthily eating, we’re all human and we all share a common little weakness called delicious food.
Hopefully, with that said, this article can gives the guidance needed to live peaceably with these food groups.
May you leave that bathroom throne with a song in your heart instead of a pain in your…you know.
Keep laughing, stay healthy and as always, thank you for reading.